tap my glass

I’ve had some dealings with the post office lately, i’m hoping someone can shed some light on some possibilities i have not considered.

A few months ago i placed an order with amazon.ca for 8 or 9 music cd’s. About a week and half after i received their shipment email, i still had not received them. I checked canadapost’s tracking site, and it said the parcel was delivered to the recipient a week ago. I phoned canada post, and they said they can’t do anything, i should call amazon. So i did, and they said “this happens”, and said they’d resend the entire parcel. It surprised me how easily they agreed to do this, but whatever, i was happy.

This time I followed this tracking number a little closer, and when canadapost said this package had been delivered and it had not, i grew worried. I called amazon again, and again they were very nice. They said they rarely send a parcel 3 times, but made an exception for me cause i really wanted these cd’s (they also would’ve just refunded my money at this point). The availability of one of the cd’s was a little off, so they graciously offered to split the shipment up into 2 chunks.

Again, i followed the tracking info, the bulk of the items being the first thing shipped. I added myself as an email recipient for updates on changes to the status of the package tracking. When i got the email telling me this package was delivered i was home. I of course went straight outside, again to find no package waiting for me. My guess is this info isn’t “up to the minute”, and likely was reported delivered the previous day (when i was not home).

A few days later, the lone late cd did arrive in my mailbox. My mailbox is pretty standard, big enough to fit a small parcel, but any larger parcel would stick out the top. I’ve gotten books from amazon before, and they did stick out the top. This was the first time i’ve ever had any issues.

I called amazon again, they were apologetic, but we both agreed there was nothing left for them to do. They refunded my money, and someone out there might very well have 3 copies of neon bible, joel plaskett’s new cd, and a variety of other kickass albums. I ordered all the missing cds again, this time shipping them to my work, and they arrived safely there within 5 or so days.

So what happened? Is it possible that “bad people” stole these parcels off my doorstep 3 times, when previous amazon packages that were sticking out of my mailbox arrived in my safe hands? This is the only possibility i can possibly accept. Did someone in the middle (ie an employee) scam them? Unlikely considering the parcel did arrive to my work. Is it possible amazon never actually sent them? Very unlikely considering canada post did note tracking info. Can anyone think of any other possibilities?

I was told by someone (can’t remember who) that you can request canada post not deliver parcels to your door without a signature. I called canada post and asked about this. They said i can not do this, but i can ask that parcels not be left at my house. They referred to this practice as “safedrop” (not sure whats safe about it though!). You are allowed to request that letter carriers “do not safedrop”. The lady asked me to put a note on my mailbox that says “do not safedrop” and that she would put a request in to the depot marking my address with this same bit of info. So i did these 2 things. I got a call today from the local centertown postal outlet. The lady there informs me that letter carriers never leave parcels that do not completely fit in the mailbox. I said… ok. I didn’t know what else to say, as well, i had no additional ideas. I was tired, frustrated, and bewildered.

With the package that i did successfully get delivered to my office i debated filling it with cat poo, arming my house with cameras, eagerly hoping to catch a culprit… but i lost interest. The cat poo woulda been fun, but some possible outcomes could’ve been disastrous for my property, so i opted against it.

I really hope it isn’t skids walking by scoping out folks’ mailbox’s in hopes of treasures… i really really hope this isn’t the case… but the whole situation has added to my cynicism, which was sparse before but increasingly grows as i do. Which kinda blows.

Not much has changed, not much is new. Life has been very good lately. As evidence of this, i will present this image, my lunch on this march 16th 2007.
- de cecco tagliatelle, comes in spools, best dried pasta you can buy
- 3 large mushrooms, sliced
- 8 cherry tomatos, halved
- a bunch green onions, 1.5 inch pieces
- 3 cloves garlic, coarsely chopped
- half red pepper - unnecessary
- pinches of hot peppers
- tons of s & p
- large bunch parsley, chopped
- a tablespoon or 2 of olive oil
- a bit of wine, a bit of broth, optional, unnecessary

1 Start water on high, start fry pan on med-high
2 add shrooms n pepper, cook for a few min
3 add pasta to water when boiling
4 add oil and s n p n hot peppers to pan
5 a few min later add rest of stuff to fry pan
6 keep on kookin!
7 when pasta done, spoon directly into pan, add a bit more oil, combine

Eat!!! This may not be everyones cup of tea, but a refreshing pasta lunch like this revitalizes me like nothing else.

I’m working from home today, it rules. Things of note:
- Apparently my blog is worth a little over 500 bux:
- Its getting warmer! Soon to start running in prep for 10 million K!!!
- House stuff mostly on hold, trying to find people to build a deck for you can be hard work.

Apparently this, the original location, was sold to a couple a few months ago. They’ve slowly been changing this n that, and as we arrived last weekend there was no art on the walls, different paint inside, and a different cook n sou. The sign is supposed to change soon (if it hasn’t already) to “jaks kitchen” (not sure of the spelling). This blows imo, the new owners are going to be more evening menu focused, which is ridiculous cause they make shiteloads on their weekend brunch. Hopefully it doesn’t change too much and they get a chef that can make homies, cause the dude there this weekend could NOT! That and they were almost out of potatos, they were out of sourdough, and their fruit sucked too. None of these are good signs that encourage growth or continuance of one of my favorite weekend rituals.

Change blows.

Are there people out there that don’t want to be happy? Is the desire for happiness so inherent, perhaps the only prevelant inherent thing in everyones personality? Can we be happy if we have desires? Is there a grey area? Some would argue not. I definitely believe there is. If we are just our genes, and just our propagation capabilities, then this stasis requires ambivilence, and happiness is the cattle prod to ensure we don’t end it too soon. I for one, welcome happiness, and can think of no better way to spend this sentience. If it is our idea passing capabilites, then i have a lot more to learn, cause this meme business is over my happy head. Ahh, ignorance…

This has been an exciting year for me. For a lot of people. Ups, downs, stasis. I’m writing this in the back room of my place that has been gutted, had new drywall, ceiling, floors, window, etc.. Thats change for ya. And thats only on the surface, what lies beneath is much more interesting. I like that certain things i read and people i listen to reveal that everyone is exploring, all the time. I think going to new places is great, its one of the great advantages to living in an urban area. Of course, you can do this in the bush, but you have to be a lot more observant or creative. Here, there’s always some bloke willing to treat you to some new speciality, sight sound or smell, something that you wouldn’t find in your own backyard (if you’re lucky enough to have one). I think taking advantage of this, and being happy about your discoveries, good or bad, is precious.

Back to the bevelutions. In order for me to maintain this degree of happiness for another year, i think i’ll have to get my health back. It has been slowly depreciating in value as the interest rates my bodies credit pay increase (ie age). Old grey liver, ain’t what she used to be, ain’t what she used to be… actually my liver’s ok, its my lungs that i think suck ass. Need to clean em up, clean em out. Perhaps cleanse time again, perhaps procrastinatory lifestyle, who knows. I’m obsiously non-commital about cleaning, i just read what i just wrote, its from the heart, and it probably means 1 less smoke a month. Shits killing me, for sure.

I believe, as pompous as this may sound, that my recent fortunes have strung from among many other things, my desire for good karma. I believe acts, even if performed in solitude, that make you a better peson, will make you a better person to others as well. Everything you do reflects on your personality. Mabye not right now, but in time, definitely. I try to do the best i can for a) myself and b) people around me. I don’t want to f*ck anyone over, ever. And if i can take a burn, or a burden, or a bruise if it means someone else might have a slight decrease in suffering or pain, i’ll take it. I’m a “confrontation avoider”. Bring it, i’ll fold. And i’ll be happier for it. Boring yes, ignorant probably, happy for 2006 definitely, 2007 hopefully too. Have an uberkickass holdiay if you got one, slack if you don’t, thanks for reading this far in this boring assed biatch of an infrequent rant.

When i was in grade four i fainted for the first time. I was at school, in the evening, and we were doing some choral recital thing. I’m sure i was a lousy singer, probably hated it, but everyone had to do it. I was standing in the back row, elevated slightly. My mom was there, all the other parents too. I don’t remember it too well, but i believe it was mid way through the 2nd or 3rd song when i started feeling dizzy. I didn’t think too much of it, but then i distictly remember wondering if my head would reach the bookshelves to my right. When i openned my eyes my forhead hurt and i was mostly horizantal with a crowd of very concerned adults surrounding me. I didn’t really know what happenned, but eventually figured it out. A good friend of mine was standing in front of me, luckily he broke my fall else i might’a broken my neck. My mom took me outside, i got some air and that was that. I had a big rug burn on my forehead.

That was the first time, but certainly not the last time i’ve fainted in my life. The next time wasn’t long after wandering through a mall with my mom, i just passed out. I began to recoginize the warning signs after that, and could normally sit my ass down or splash some water on my face before i fell. I did some kung fu training when i was about 16 or so, in my first class i passed out. Everyone was *really* concerned there, i tried to tell them it was normal and nothing to worry about. Was it?

When i was at school in queens i spent an eve over at some friends house watching movies, having a few beers, and smoking some shite. I wasn’t obliterated, but i was feeling pretty good when i left - i was probably feeling about average for bedtime given the serious daubachery that occurred during those formitive years. About 100 yards of walking later, and i was losing it. I fell to the ground in a heap on the sidewalk, and woke up a little while later, probably out for only a few seconds. I believe a couple people were hanging out near by and came by to help. I managed to drag myself up to their step and sat down. They were very nice and asked if they should call an ambulance. I said no, this is normal, and i just needed to sit for a little while. I can’t blame them for not believing me, and going inside and calling an ambulance. They then stood inside the door and peered out at me until it showed up. The dudes did the light in the eye thing and asked questions. I was quite coherant by this point, and explained the possible contributing factor of recent wisdom teeth removal and continuing meds taking (ibprofen). They said ok eventually, and the dudes called a cab and that was that. That was the last time i fainted before tonite.

Just as in most cases, serious creep up occurred. I got to the tavern, drank a beer and had a smoke. Before i left my house i wolfed down some pb and banana sandwiches cause it was about the only food in the house, and didn’t really eat much else all day. After the beer i was quite bloated, and didn’t really feel too good. Decided to head downstairs to pee, feeling that it might gimme some space. I got to the urinal, and as soon as i started peeing, i felt massively woozy. I was like “this feels like those fainting warning signs”. And i was like “no”… and then i was like “o shit”. Finished peeing, luckily, and stumbled to the sink where i denied the possibility for a few more moments while i hastily washed my hands. Then as i tried to leave i was thinking “theres no way i’ll make it up the stairs”, and didn’t as i collapsed more or less outside the door. It wasn’t a total black out, but damn close. Some dude offerred witty remarks and some help as i eventually made it back into the can to splash water my face, almost pass out again, sit down for a minute or 2, then get back up, and really splash water on my face. I started to feel better after that. I chatted with the guy and i guess convinced him that i wasn’t drunk or stoned, that this is normalish for me.

Went upstairs, seriously woozy but capable, and got a water at the bar. I was apparently white as a ghost, which was no surprise to me. I went outside and informed my friends of the issue, and decide to bail on the massive card action in the midst. Went to herb n spice, got some salty and sugarry foods, some fruit, and walked home without incident.

Would you be worried? Only now that i’m older and my body has represented signs of weakness do i really think its something i should consider looking in to. Mabye i will when i get my next physical, which probably won’t be until something really serious is wrong… which is stupid.

I woke up this morning round 5 with a funny feeling. It took me a few seconds to realize what it was, and when i did i was quite shocked. I felt like i was gonna puke. I had really thin saliva throughout my mouth, and my body was telling me to get to a toliet, fast. I was more in shock than anything, i didn’t drink (much) the previous night, so i was like “what the fuck?”.

I hit the can, but managed to hold it back, or at least it didn’t come flying out. I wondered “what did i eat”? I did have a bit of sushi the night before, but i also did the night before, and the night before that… hmmm. Coulda been a bad veggie, a bad chunk of highly concentrated pesticide?

Anyways, when i woke up, it was still kinda there, but tolerable. Gone by the time i got to work. Very strange. I’ve never felt like i had to vomit without intoxication. Hmmm… this is probably just another one of those older things. I’ve noticed now that i’m “older” (ha!), every few days you experience a normally uncomfortable feeling you’ve *never* experienced before. Bodies are capable of a lot of feelings, hopefully i’ll have a few decades more of them.

I gots me a ceiling fan in my kitchen. It keeps my place cool in the day, but at night it roasts. I cleaned the dirt off the top this past weekend, not as bad as i thought it would be.

It just dumped some rain down, its cooler and my trees didn’t get hit by lightning, so i’m happy. When it be a hot outside, people be slow, and thirsty. I was thirsty tonite, had to get out, went to an old stomping ground for some stomping. It was nice. I stomped. A little anyways, home by 11:30. Moosehead in a bottle is good, cause it stays reasonably refreshing for its duration…

Even my writing is slow… ssssslllllooooowwwww… i should sleep now. Yes.

Btw - wilco was awsome.

So i got back from the trip. Over a week ago now, but the time has flown. New york was an absolute blast. 7 and half hours to get there, not too shabby. We stayed in a relatively nice hotel in manhattan. As we showed up, parked our car next door, and started walking to the door there was an apparently miscellanous new yorker outside who asked “You have reservations?” and we said ya and told her the name - she’s like “nobody here by that name”… but of course, there was, just minor confusion. That was the rudest anyone was to us for the entire time we were in the city. Everyone there was super cool.

The first night we spent wandering around manhattan. Went through union square. Its this super cool hangout spot filled with young folk and all folks alike, folks playing drums and some kickass skaters. That was cool. We wandered a whole whack loads and eventually found our way into the Bleeker Street Bar (or something). It was fun, pints were had, good times. Then went off to the Peculiar Pub, it was a university crowd (apparently) but also quite cool. Not too drunk, we went back to the hotel, but not before i ate some street meat, some wikid beancurd rice things from this korean take out, and then finally a scicilian slice. Holy crap, awesome stuff.

The next day was straight up wandering. From our hotel (i think it was at 33nd and 2nd) southwest a bit to broadway, all the way up through times square to central park where we took a load off, and then trained down to the pierish area, checked the statue, saw wall street, and wandered back shopping, touring, seeing, and finally a quick snooze back at the pad. After which we went to meet some fellow canadians at a bar to watch game 6 of the oilers game (they won). They then took us to mcsorleys. Very cool spot. Apparently the longest continually running bar in ny, since 1854 or something (not sure about prohibition, but o well). They only serve 2 kinds of drinks. Light beer, and dark beer, a buck a piece (actually a little more, i think 24 beers was 28 bux or something). The place was dripping with charm.

Phew. The next day, hungover, we drove into brooklyn and checked diner quickly for some greesy spoonage. Not bad. Then through hasidic jew town all the way to coney island. “She’s my coney island baby…” ya i kept hearing that but it wasn’t playing. But the hot dogs were. And some of the ugliest people on the planet - very few attractive folks out of the 50 or so thousand people that were out on the beach, but i wasn’t complaining (much). Once full and hot and flustered, off to AC!

And in AC, well, I gambled and drank free but slow to be delivered beer. Mostly we only played 2/4 limit holdem, but i tried my hand at a tourny (only 22 folks) and some 1/2 NL. All was wicked fun although i lost a bunch of money - i was within budget, but still annoyed i lost. Thats me i guess. I didn’t know what to do when i was raised the rest of my stack (about a hundred bux) when i had top 2 pair!!! Damn mofo coulda had pocket tens too and still destroyed me, but no, he had to have QJ!!! Damn 25 dollar preflop raise didn’t help. I’ll learn for next time, and will probably call all over again. O well, it was a massive blast.

AC is basically a shit hole, i’ll probalby never go back unless i’m in the area. The gambling is relatively small scale, and thats about all thats there. The city is “scary”, and the only place that is safe is the boardwalk, which is actually kinda nice except for the occasional really scary crack-whorish looking people walking by. I hate to generalize, but damn, some nasty nasty faces were seen. And then there was the off key singer who would tap her foot and belt out american anthem style songs only to pause every song or so to spit a massive wad of phlegm over the side of the walkway. You bet i gave her 2 bits!!

On the way home we hit up some philly, got a cheese steak sandwhich, and toured the streets a bit. Very cool town. All low rise, lots of charm n class n love, very cool. And then we roared home slightly poorer but much richer for the cause. Good times had by all. All pics are viewable here.

There is more to tell - like that korean place in ny. The 2nd night my meal was this 5$ squid n cuke dish, so frickin spicy *I* couldn’t finish it!!! I can finish anything, especially whilst intoxicated!!! I ate it at a little corner near the hotel, like 3am or something. Good times. Ahh, so many good times.

The AC deally left my wanting more… more gambling, more degeneration, more lucridiviness. I’m going to vegas, sooner than later. There’s just no excuses anymore.

Well four of us are off today on a 4/5 day journey, one that will bring me, for the first time, to the first city of the world, new york city. I’ve never been, and never really had plans on going until a month or 2 ago a bunch of us, intoxicated no doubt, decided we should go to atlantic city to get our gamble on. Hell, if we’re doing that, why not stop in for a night/day in new york? Damn straight.

Leaving in 2-minus, 2 hours. Back on tuesday. 2 nights in each city. Tomorrow i’ll be strolling around the fair streets, hopefully seeing places seen so many times on seinfeld and sex in the city and various other media outlets. Originally i wasn’t so excited, but now i totally am. How could i not be? I’ve seen and heard stories of this famous city for my whole life, never dreaming i’d have a reason to go. Now i do, and now i get to see it with mine own eyes. Many pictures will be taken, hopefully one or 2 will turn out and get posted here days five from now.

And even better, i’m off work next week!!! I’m gonna hopefully tackle massive washroom renovations, removing it all, drywall, new sink, tile, paint, etc.. I just have to hold in my crap for a few days, or eat lots of fast food to use their can. And after the binge trip i’m heading on shortly, this may not be an option… having these as my biggest decisions and tribulations, fills me with great pleasure, satisfaction, pride, and humility, i take none of this for granted, and am very grateful to be in this position…

On my way home tonite i saw something i haven’t seen in a while. A pro and con of my hood. She was standing right outside the store i buy my cigs at, accross from where i do my laundry drop off, and dry cleaning. I don’t think she’s in either of those businesses. I had the urge to ask ‘are you lost?’, or ‘whats going on?’, but i didn’t. I also had the urge to say ‘get the hell outta my neighbourhood!!’. But i didn’t do any of that. If she was on *my* street, i probably woulda been a bit more defensive. I remember a few years back when i lived a couple blocks away, me and my drunken friends yelling obscenities at these ladies that were trying to make an honest but perhaps unethical dime. Now, i feel like this is more of my home, and perhaps theres something i should be doing to protect it.

But then again, if she’s not here, she’ll be somewhere else, in someone elses neighbourhood. There must be a market after all, supply and demand and all that crap. Who’s to say she isn’t as much a part of my neighbourhood as i am. In fact she (or they) have been here much longer than i have. Gladstone is notorious. And she really doesn’t bother me that much… its more the people she brings. The crackheads (thats what i call people that mostly bum change but occasionally bum change and are totally tweaked on something) would really piss me off if they hung out on my street, but when they’re only surrounding the bars i hang out at on bank street its not such a “close to home” annoyance, and simply tolerated.

She’s probably still standing there now… waiting for the con. Hopefully she has a good nite i guess. I of course would prefer her to have a sobering night, decide its time to quit, get some other income supplement, and never bait her hook in my, or anyone elses neighbourhood again. But that is wishful thinking. I remember amsterdam about 8 or 9 years ago. That was something. Girls in the windows with red lights over their heads. But even that amount of organization still concealed alleys and nooks and crannies filled with even more undesirables that didn’t fit into the system. There will always be flaws, and always cracks in the system waiting to be filled if the desire is there. If humans developed their brains faster, we’d never of needed the pleasure aspect of sex to realize we needed to procreate to survive - we woulda known reproduction was the only means, and pleasure would of never been an issue. Just think of the things we could of accomplished… bah, we probably would’ve used our increased intellectual capacity to trick evoltion into blessing us with sex organs that gave us pleasure… damn we’re smart. We live for sex, and because of sex we live on.